Wednesday, August 19, 2015

WORLDBUILDING WEDNESDAY: The Rise and Fall of The Bastards


So, as Status Quo Radio will be a concept album, and Alpha Riff, who I saw at ONF, is doing this grandiose concept album series thing (ala Janelle Monae) called "Digital Champions" it got my noodle ticking (because that metaphor makes sense), so, here's the first edition of my equivalent of Uncharted Realms, Worldbuilding Wednesday:

The Bastards formed a couple months before graduation at Badlands Public High School. Four friends, bored with playing in the marching band, put down their brass and woodwinds for guitars and drums.

Originally, they called themselves The Brawlers, the name of their school's sports team. However, one night, they were playing at fellow student's house as part of a graduation party. They were playing so loud, a neighbor complained, yelling across the street. "SHUT UP YOU FUCKIN' BASTARDS!" Hearing that, the band decided to call themselves The Bastards from that day forward. They then also decided to antagonize said neighbor by crank their music up louder.

After graduation, the band began playing more shows,packing bars and clubs, eventually earning the attention of record executive Paul Ling from the label "Rock Everyone Demands!"

Under Ling's suggestion, they all wore matching purple suits and had corporate logos on their instruments. He had also suggested that each member took on a persona with the group's namesake. The drummer was then known as Beat Bastard, the bassist would be Bass Bastard, lead guitarist and piano player would be Lead Bastard, and the rhythm guitarist and songwriter called himself Rhythm Bastard.

While the band thought it as a farce to mock other groups of the day, audiences everywhere ate up the gimmick and loved their music, playing bigger shows in bigger venues.


Their peak moment was when they were to perform their most popular song, "Status Quo Radio” on the hottest music show on KQUO, “Live From The Gravel Pit”. Before the band was to go on stage, Ling had told Rhythm Bastard that the Administrator of the network had requested some changes to the lyrics.

During their performance, groupies rushed the stage causing a horrible catastrophe, resulting in the deaths of Lead, Bass and Beat Bastard. Rhythm Bastard was presumed to be dead after jumping out the second floor of the studio.


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